Aeronautical Randomness
Would you lick the lav floor?
March 8, 2012

Alright… this is a little silly.  If you came to my blog to read intelligent, insightful information about the pilot profession, please stop reading and wait for the next post.

The other day, one of the cleaners boarded the plane to scrub the lavatory.  As I stood in the front galley saying goodbye to guests, I had a clear view of the lavatory floor.

I cannot look into a lavatory without thinking about a flight attendant from my previous company.  One day, when I exited the lav during a routine in-flight bathroom break, she casually asked the question that has stuck with me for years:

“For a million dollars, would you lick the lav floor?”

She put no further stipulations on the question.  Assuming I could have a gallon of Listerine handy, I answered “yes.”

A million dollars is a lot of money.  It may be gross, but, in my humble opinion, the risk/reward would be worth it.

I thought it would be fun to take a little informal poll.

For this poll, you are NOT on one of our aircraft. Our planes are new and the cleaners scrub the lavs between flights.  As you answer, imagine a lavatory on a thirty year old vintage aircraft at a legacy carrier.  That’s what I was on when I was asked the question.


Would you lick an airplane lavatory floor for a million dollars?

View Results

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Pass this along to your friends.  I’m curious to see the results.  After you answer, you are always free to elaborate with a comment.

Note: This is just a fun poll and in no way implies any financial agreement if you are crazy enough to actually lick a lavatory floor.

Note Two: Answers are anonymous.  I will not sell your willingness to lick a lav floor to any third party.  If you start getting pop-up ads for disinfectants, it is purely a coincidence.

About author

Renewed Pilot

I've endured a roller coaster career in the U.S. Aviation Industry. Currently flying the 737 on my third try with the same legacy carrier, I have also flown for a regional, fractional and start-up carrier. My piloting experience includes the 737, A320, 727, Citation Excel, Citation Bravo, Saab 340 and many light singles and twin engine aircraft. I reside in the suburbs of Nashville, Tennessee.

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There are 7 comments

  • Brian White says:

    Hilarious question BT! Heck yeah I’d do it!!

  • Courtney says:

    A million dollars pays a lot of college….I answered YES! 😉

    • Pays a lot of bills! When she asked me the question, I got the impression she wasn’t really grasping the magnitude of $1 million. I certainly wouldn’t do it for a hundred. 🙂

  • capnaux says:

    I’m a pilot. I’d reject a takeoff to grab that dollar bill blowing across the runway. Hell ya I’d do it for a mill!

    But I’m with you, NOT for 100! $1,000? $2,000? Hmm….

  • Toraine Torrence says:

    I used to work for Pinnacle airlines as an aircraft cleaner. I know first hand about cleaning the lav. I applied for the job to get my foot into the industry and began my networking venture but after a while, I had to let it go due to school schedule, but it is intense for the work. Before this job, I would say no to licking the lav floor, after working in that capacity, for about $100 million dollars (taxed free hopefully)- I would lick the floor…This is to funny. Good Survey Question…?

  • Sydney says:

    A million dollars can go a long way and would pay off a lot of aviation debt so I definitely would make the conscious decision before I just jump on down to get a lick but would certainly do it for a nicely cut check. That million would pay of the debt plus a nice doctor visit for testing 🙂

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